it is absolutely a blessing to say that i have never had to make arrangements for someone who has died. it is a reality check to have experienced that - albeit secondhand. i sat with my friend as she (and her brother and grandmother) tried to sort through the catalogues, options, and requirements related to death, burial, and memorials. thankfully, my friend's uncle works in the industry, and was able not only to walk my friend and her family through the difficult choices, but also to help offset the costs with some family discounts. definitely a gift from God during this incredibly difficult time.
later that day we returned to the memorial park so that my friend and her family could see and say goodbye to her mother. my friend was reminded that our bodies are just containers. in reality, our spirit, our breath, our life - these are the things that make us who we are.
my boyfriend arrived in town that night, and it was wonderful to have his support and encouragement. i definitely needed it!
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Thursday, July 14, 2011
reality check. 1.
the past 2 weeks have been a serious reality check.
it started with a mid-day phone call from my best friend to tell me that her mother had died. this was completely unexpected. there was no serious illness, no warning signs. just here one minute, gone the next. in a whirlwind, i packed up work from my desk, made a couple of phone calls, drove home, packed a suitcase, and was dropped off at the airport. a couple of hours later, i was hugging my friend, not sure what to say in the wake of this unbelievable and unbearable tragedy.
we spent the evening in mourning. and the next day we had to make a 4 hour drive to where my friend's mother had been vacationing so that my friend could sign some paperwork and take care of some things. after the business was taken care of, we made a stop at taylor creek, a gorgeous creek-side trail where my friend had gone many times with her mother and family. it was a beautiful afternoon and the creek was overflowing. we even stripped off our shoes and socks to wade through parts of the paved trail. i held my friend's hand as we walked the last section of the trail back to the lookout and as she read from Ecclesiastes. yes, there is a time and a season for everything, but it certainly doesn't feel like this is the right time or season for this loss. a reality check.
the reality is that we don't know what happened. and we won't for another few weeks. there's a chance we'll never know what happened. but the reality is our days here are numbered. there is a time to be born and a time to die. and that time can be really sucky.
it started with a mid-day phone call from my best friend to tell me that her mother had died. this was completely unexpected. there was no serious illness, no warning signs. just here one minute, gone the next. in a whirlwind, i packed up work from my desk, made a couple of phone calls, drove home, packed a suitcase, and was dropped off at the airport. a couple of hours later, i was hugging my friend, not sure what to say in the wake of this unbelievable and unbearable tragedy.
we spent the evening in mourning. and the next day we had to make a 4 hour drive to where my friend's mother had been vacationing so that my friend could sign some paperwork and take care of some things. after the business was taken care of, we made a stop at taylor creek, a gorgeous creek-side trail where my friend had gone many times with her mother and family. it was a beautiful afternoon and the creek was overflowing. we even stripped off our shoes and socks to wade through parts of the paved trail. i held my friend's hand as we walked the last section of the trail back to the lookout and as she read from Ecclesiastes. yes, there is a time and a season for everything, but it certainly doesn't feel like this is the right time or season for this loss. a reality check.
the reality is that we don't know what happened. and we won't for another few weeks. there's a chance we'll never know what happened. but the reality is our days here are numbered. there is a time to be born and a time to die. and that time can be really sucky.
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